Self Portrait

Rueby Tuesday by Carlos and Jean Aleman

Reuben wanted to follow up on Dr. Phil's advise, so he went back to his cabin and his life of isolation. In order to comfort himself after his separation from Oprah, Reuben sought solace in painting, which had long been a passion of his, but which he had not had time to pursue.

His first major work is "Reuben's self-portrait." He modelled the painting after the work of his namesake, the great Rubens, whose life and work Reuben spent time studying in his youth. He took care to match the subtle light and shadows of the master.

Upon hearing of the piece, art critics from around the country praised the work. "Magnificent," said one. "Absolutely mesmerizing," raves another.

Reuben is so happy with his new-found profession that he forgets Oprah completely.

Reuben on Dr. Phil

Rueby Tuesday by Carlos and Jean Aleman

Oprah took pity on Reuben and his obsession with her, so she called on her good friend Dr. Phil to help Reuben with his problem. Dr.Phil had heard about the extremity of the problem, so he was reluctant to appear with Reuben. But, after much coaxing from Oprah, Dr. Phil agrees to counsel Reuben.

Dr. Phil: Now Reuben, you know that your constant need to be around Oprah is not healthy, don't you?

Reuben: Yes, Dr. Phil. But I cannot resist the urge to be near her. She is such a wonderful person.

Dr. Phil: But Reuben, don't you see that you're a wonderful person in your own right? You have accomplished so much in your lifetime. You are an athlete, a director, an actor and a poet. How many doggies can say that they've done as much with their lives as you've done with yours?

Reuben: You're right, Dr. Phil. But how do I rid myself of this need to be with Oprah?

Dr. Phil: Reuben, you have to remember that you are your own person. You have a great deal of worth in your own right. You must move on with your life. Think about your accomplishments. Stop defining your self worth through someone else.

Reuben: Thank you Dr. Phil. You have been so helpful.

The Phantom of the Oprah

Reuby Tuesday by Jean and Carlos Aleman

Reuben's recent appearance on the Oprah Winfrey show was so memorable that he could not bear to leave. When his segment was over, he slipped past the security guards and went into a broom closet. He did not venture out again until after the crew had left. He found his way into the attic and decided to stay so that he could be close to Oprah.

Soon, his legend began to spread. Oprah and the crew began to tell stories of a ghost haunting the show. Sometimes, they would see a shadowy figure lurking in the background. And then came the notes.

At first, the notes were relatively harmless. They would ask for a lock of Oprah's hair, perhaps an autographed photo. But soon, the Phantom got more demanding. He asked for doggie treats to be left by the attic door and Kibbles and Bits with the yucky pieces removed.

Oprah's advisors told her adamently that she was not to give in to the demands. But then they noticed that strange things started happening. Chicken sandwiches started disappearing. Decapitated dog toys were left on the stage. And so the legend grew....the Phantom of the Oprah.